Psychic Bitches Answer Your Questions

Seeking bald half Asian thrice divorced man

Article from Celestial Fury
To book a reading please visit: StarBreezeTarot

I am seeking a bald, half Asian man who has been divorced at least three times.

The vehicle he drives must be either orange or purple.

NO Christmas tree air fresheners but Daffy Duck or Tweety are acceptable.

You must not wear red Polo shirts EVER.

When you add the letters of your first and last name together, the sum must be an odd number but NOT 23.

Drinkers are OK but only bottled beer and you must buy it by the 12 pack,not 6 pack or case, unless its Wednesday, then 6 packs are OK.

I am 5’8. You must be at least 8 inches taller than me. However, for every 4 years you are above the age requirement, you may subtract 1. For every 3 years you are below the age requirement, you may subtract two. Add 2 to the sum total if the length of your fingers is 3 1/2 inches or longer. But you must then subtract 6.5 years for every centimeter that your fingers is above the 3.5 requirement. (note: The deficiency in the length requirement regarding your digits could necessitate a reconfiguration in the aforementioned height/age ratio.)

You must never say the words but/butt. Due to the fact that these words are interchangeable, you must eliminate this word from your vocabulary entirely so I do not misconstrue the meaning.

Also, when you call me, you must only let the phone ring an odd number of times. Voicemails and emails should be 3 , 7 , or 29 sentences only. If you are on line 28 and can’t come up with another line, you must delete the whole email and start over. The last 2 words in the last 2 sentences of every email must rhyme. No exceptions.

You must only shop at grocery stores with brown plastic bags not white.

All rules (written and unwritten) must be followed with all due explicicity. Note : If you do not know the meaning of explicicity, disqualification is automatic.

Rules are subject to change without prior written notification.

I am a very laid back and accepting person who is easy to get along with.

About the Author:
OCD dating profile is copyright E. Davis. Please do not post it elsewhere. If you’d like to share it with someone, please send them a link to the Psychic Bitch website.